Who in the world isn't on Facebook? - CNN.com

Who in the world isn't on Facebook? - CNN.com

The Pope's Chauffeur

After getting the entire Pope's luggage loaded into the limo, (and he doesn't travel light), the driver notices the Pope is still standing on the curb.

'Excuse me, Your Holiness,' says the driver, 'Would you please take your seat so we can leave?'

'Well, to tell you the truth,' says the Pope, 'they never let me drive at the Vatican when I was a cardinal, and I'd really like to drive today.'

'I'm sorry, Your Holiness, but I cannot let you do that. I'd lose my job! What if something should happen?' protests the driver, wishing he'd never gone to work that morning.

'Who's going to tell?' says the Pope with a smile.

Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 205 kms. 'Please slow down, Your Holiness!' pleads the worried driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens.

'Oh, dear God, I'm going to lose my license -- and my job!' moans the driver.

The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches, but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio.

'I need to talk to the Chief,' he says to the dispatcher.

The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going 155 kph.

'So bust him,' says the Chief.

'I don't think we want to do that, he's really important,' said the cop.

The Chief exclaimed,' All the more reason!'

'No, I mean really important,' said the cop with a bit of persistence.

The Chief then asked, 'Who do you have there, the mayor?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

Chief: ' A senator?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

Chief: 'The Prime Minister?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

'Well,' said the Chief, 'who is it?'

Cop: 'I think it's God!'

The Chief is even more puzzled and curious, 'What makes you think it's God?'

Cop: 'His chauffeur is the Pope!'

My dream Coke Machine

Frisbee inventor dies

The simplest inventions are sometimes the ones that have a huge impact. These inventors are mostly unsung heroes. One of those heroes passed away this week at the age of 90.

Walter Frederick "Fred" Morrison invented the Frisbee flying disc. Throwing something flat had been done before, but Fred Morrison was the one who developed it commercially. He started experimenting with designs in 1937, and his best-selling design, the Pluto Platter, captured the attention of Wham-O the toy company famous for its hula hoop.

The Frisbee takes its name from the Frisbie Pie Co. in New England where college students used empty pie tins as flying discs.

Wham-O has sold more than 200 million Frisbees since 1957 when they signed the contract with Fred Morrison.

Today's Frisbee primarily focuses on catering to the crowd of disc sports fans. They make special Frisbees for Ultimate Frisbee, a rugby style game, Frisbee Golf and Freestyle Frisbees designed for trick tosses.

Leagues and clubs exist at hundreds of colleges and high schools across the country.

In this high-tech age a simple plastic disc seems to still have mass appeal.

Groundhog Day 2010, A Lame Holiday? A PR Dream?

The guy on the news said Groundhog's Day is the lamest holiday. I beg to differ. My kids were so excited. We watched the news as a family over breakfast, and I didn't have to buy them any crap. Awesome holiday. BTW, Phil saw his shadow.

PETA was protesting Groundhog Day, saying Phil shouldn't be kept in captivity because he's a wild animal. They actually suggested replacing Phil with an electronic/robotic groundhog.  

He is the most well cared for groundhog in the world. He's doing much better than his cousin, Punxatawny Roadkill. I'm all for treating animals ethically, but now they are just looking for headlines. No wonder people don't take PETA seriously. They do good work under a shroud of PR bullshit. Sad really.