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Showing posts from September, 2007

Friday Funnies: Las Vegas

Voices: Go to Las Vegas

There's a guy who lives in Ohio. One morning, he hears a voice in his head. The voice says, ''Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money, and go to Las Vegas.''

He ignores the voice. Later in the day, he hears the voice again. ''Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money, and go to Las Vegas.''

Again, he ignores the voice. Soon he hears the voice every minute of the day. ''Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money, and move to Las Vegas.''

He can't take it anymore. He believes the voice. He quits his job, sells his house, takes all his money, and flies to Las Vegas. As soon as he steps off the plane, the voice says, ''Go to Caesar's Palace.''

He goes to Caesar's Palace and the voice says, ''Make your way to the roulette tables.''

He goes to the roulette tables and the voice says, ''Put all your money on red 23.''

He puts all his…

University of Michigan Adds 14 Wheelchair Accessible Seats to Their Stadium

I've always been a big fan of the University of Michigan, not the football team, but the university in general. They've gone to the mat in favor of affirmative action and they've developed a world-class educational facility. Their sports teams are nothing to snicker at either, even if I am a Penn State fan.

However, the University of Michigan lost points with me this week when they announced they were adding 14 seats for wheelchairs to their stadium. So you may be wondering why I'm upset about them adding seats.

They are adding 14 seats which brings their grand total to 104. All 90 seats currently are in the end zone, traditionally known as the cheap seats in football. The 14 seats they are adding is because they were sued. The way the Americans with disabilities act reads is that when a building undergoes major renovations those renovations are required to increase accessibility.

The university is claiming that the renovations were actually just repairs because it …

Russian Governor: Skip Work, Have Sex

The Russians are bringing a new meaning to the term Hump Day, literally. Reuters reported today, "The governor of a central Russian province urged couples to skip work Wednesday and make love instead to help boost Russia's low birth-rate."

Many European countries are faced with declining population. Several of them, including Russia, have developed incentive programs to encourage women to get pregnant.

Russia's largest national holiday is June 12, exactly 9 months from today. Russia is holding a lottery of sorts, where the entrance fee is one baby. Any woman who gives birth to a baby on June 12 is eligible. Preferences are given to married women, but single women are also eligible. Prizes include household luxuries such as refrigerators and televisions. Last year's grand prize was a Jeep. This year, the grand prize is an apartment.

According to Reuters: "Russia wants to reverse a trend in which the population is shrinking by about 700,000 people a year …