Skip to main content

Friday Funnies: Playtime



TV commercials now show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. ~ Jerry Seinfeld
---
There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy on the streets? ~ Dick Cavett
---
A conservative minister walks into a hotel and goes to the desk. He walks up to te receptionist and says "Excuse me, have you disabled adult movies?" The receptionist replies "No. We just have the regular kind."
---
A man goes to see his doctor. He has a hot dog sticking out of one ear, a hot dog bun sticking out of the other, and two french fries jammed up his nose. He says to the doctor, "I'm not feeling well. What's wrong with me?"

The doctor says, "I'm not sure. Are you eating right?"

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Friday Funnies: a couple LOLcats and one shameless plug

Is this the new flavor at Kungaloosh Gourmet Tea Company?

I'm Disabled and I Can Prove It

I'm disabled. 
I was born in 1970. About a year later I was diagnosed with spinal muscular atrophy. I never walked. I got my first wheelchair at kindergarten age, and my first power wheelchair in sixth grade.
Yet, around 4 to 6 times per year I have to, for one reason or another, prove that I'm disabled.
Granted, I'm 5 feet nothin', 112 pounds and sit in an electric wheelchair, but apparently that's just anecdotal evidence… We need science!
The Good Doctor
Every couple months I have to send my physician a form and ask him to fill it out. He has to state that I have spinal muscular atrophy, identify the diagnosis date, explained that my prognosis is something akin to "ain't getting better any time soon" and sign it.
With new Medicare regulations, the good doctor is not allowed to sign the said form without seeing me "face-to-face" to prevent fraud. Although I'm extraordinarily healthy, hospitalized last in 1996 for something unrelated to my dis…

Friday Funnies: Aging Gracefully

I pointed to two old drunks sitting across the bar from us and told my friend, "That's us in 10 years".

He said "That's a mirror, dip-shit!"
---