Skip to main content

Bachelor Casserole

Tonight I made my kids "Bachelor Casserole" something I used to eat a long time ago. It's super easy, super cheap, it almost tastes like real food.

I stole this photo from the web, but it's kind of similar.
Here's the recipe: Bachelor Casserole

Ingredients:

  • Two bags of Ramen noodles (I used creamy chicken)
  • one can of condensed soup (cheesy broccoli was in the cupboard)
  • one can of meat (chunk chicken in this case)
  • fresh vegetable (clearly optional)
  • breadcrumbs (to make it look like real food, again optional)

When I was a bachelor Ramen noodles were only $.10 apiece. A can of condensed soup was about a quarter, and a can of meat was less than $1.00. For about a buck and a half I could make four meals.

Step #1  -- Cook the Ramen noodles. The flavor doesn't really matter, because the flavor packets are optional. This way you can make this beef noodles with a can of tuna if you want.

Step #3 -- Drain off most of the water and add the condensed soup. Cream of Something works best. Again, it doesn't really matter. I used cheesy broccoli only because it was in my cupboard and it would go well with the fresh broccoli and had in the fridge.

Step #3.1 -- Add the meat. I usually used tuna, but cans of turkey or chicken work well too. I never tried canned ham or spam, but it's probably similar. Corned beef hash is awesome with eggs, but I don't think I'd try it here.

Step #3.2 -- Stir until it's mixed thoroughly and warm throughout.

Step #2 -- You probably should have been cooking your veggies, but let's face it, you probably wouldn't have read all of the instructions as a bachelor, so you're not really behind.

I added veggies because I have children. If you're under 30 veggies are truly an option because nothing can kill you. If you're over 30, you discovered that maybe a vegetable would have been a good idea in your 20s. If you're over 40 like me, you miss the days when you could put anything in your stomach without waking up at 2:30 in the morning needing to take a shit. (If you think I'm joking, check out the timestamp on this blog entry.)

You can boil, steam, or microwave your veggies to soften them a bit.

You probably don't have breadcrumbs if you're a bachelor, but if you do sprinkling them on top will make it look less like whatever was in your stomach after a drinking binge. Again, if you're below 30 you rarely look at your food, so breadcrumbs are optional.

You can add seasoning if you want. I threw a little garlic powder on top tonight, because, well it's garlic. Oregano, salt and pepper and bacon bits have also been used in the past. Warning: adding spices can make it seem like actual cooking.

Step #4 -- Dump the slop into a flat dish. A pie pan is good, casserole dish, whatever; we know you're limited.

Step #5 -- I sprinkled the breadcrumbs and broccoli on top, but you could stir the veggies in. Whatever.

Step #6 -- I baked it for about half an hour. Again, pretty much everything was cooked before you started, so you just need to bake it until it looks right. Don't worry about the temperature setting, because you probably don't know how to use the fancy dials anyhow. For women, bake at 350 for 30-40 minutes.

You don't have to bake it, but I think it tastes a little better.

Step #7 -- Let it sit for about half an hour if you want it to be able to slice it, otherwise grab a spoon and dig in. If you're actually a bachelor, grab a big spoon and sit down in front of the television. At this point you realize the bottom is hot so you should probably grab a hot pad, a dish towel, or put on some pants.

If you're cooking for your girlfriend, make sure you don't want to marry this one, because this dish isn't going to score you any points. But if she's just a girl, you probably want to break out the plates so you don't look like a douche.

If you have kids and your wife isn't home, one big bowl and three spoons makes you Awesome Dad.

Enjoy your new cuisine...

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Friday Funnies: Funny Retail Signs

Well, it's Friday so maybe you're planning to do a little shopping tonight. Watch carefully, and you might find some entertaining retail signage such as these. Here's a collection of funny retail signs from around the globe, mostly from the good old USA.

If you're planning to stay overnight, make sure you have a shilling and a few extra pence if you need to stable your horse. Here are the Rules of Inn.


After Christmas wrapping paper goes on sale, and so does Rapping paper, apparently.


Special offers are everywhere! You can get two drinks for the price of two! Don't worry, after four you won't notice how much you're spending anyhow.


Sometimes no caption is necessary.


But I'm so hot.  I'm sure everyone inside doesn't mind looking at me.


I didn't even bother going inside.  Clearly I would violate several of these store rules.


This was seen on a Dairy Queen drive through.  I always keep my secret ice cream money in my underwear.


You should pay a…

Safe Sex with Donald and Daisy

Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in a hotel room and Donald started to get romantic with Daisy.

The first thing Daisy asked was, "Do you have any protection?"

Donald frowned and said, "No."

Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get any protection, they could not get romantic.

"Maybe they sell some supplies at the front desk," she suggested.

So Donald went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had any supplies.

"Yes, we do," the clerk said and pulled a box out from under the counter and gave it to Donald.

The clerk asked, "Would you like me to put them on your bill?"

"HECK No!" Donald quacked, "I'll thuffocate!"

An open letter to Emmanuel Macron, President of France

Dear Pres. Macron,

The President of the United States, Donald Trump, has been invited for the celebration of Bastille Day, a day for celebrating democracy and independence of the French people.

As a citizen of the United States, I encourage you to revoke the invitation. Donald Trump does not represent the vast majority of the American people. As you have stated publicly, if the United States is not going to support science, you have offered US scientists the option of emigrating to France for the continuation of their studies on climate change.

Additionally, Donald Trump has made his nationalist and blatantly racist feelings known on multiple occasions, again something I know that you personally find offensive.

The majority of Americans would support the decision for France to revoke his invitation. Citizens of the United States need to take responsibility for removing their country from a position of influence on the world stage. Our previous president, Barack Obama, strived to be a …