Skip to main content

Great Valentine's Day Gift Ideas For Men and Women


Some women know what men really want for Valentine's Day. This woman gave him a beautiful bouquet of bacon roses, a DVD and an Xbox 360 game. Most women would give their boyfriends some hot sex. While this is nice, let's face it, it's only about 11 minutes of pleasure. The bacon alone will last at least 15 minutes.

Men are guilty of this too. They buy chocolate or lingerie. What they're saying is they want their girlfriend to look sexy, but have no interest whatsoever in helping them stay that way. I'm thinking of getting my right a gym membership and a pair of sweatpants. It tells her,"I care about your health and your body, but I love you no matter what you look or dress like."

Think about Valentines from your lover's perspective. Get them what they desire, even if it's totally screwed up in your head!

Happy Valentine's Day to all the lovers out there!


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Friday Funnies: Funny Retail Signs

Well, it's Friday so maybe you're planning to do a little shopping tonight. Watch carefully, and you might find some entertaining retail signage such as these. Here's a collection of funny retail signs from around the globe, mostly from the good old USA.

If you're planning to stay overnight, make sure you have a shilling and a few extra pence if you need to stable your horse. Here are the Rules of Inn.


After Christmas wrapping paper goes on sale, and so does Rapping paper, apparently.


Special offers are everywhere! You can get two drinks for the price of two! Don't worry, after four you won't notice how much you're spending anyhow.


Sometimes no caption is necessary.


But I'm so hot.  I'm sure everyone inside doesn't mind looking at me.


I didn't even bother going inside.  Clearly I would violate several of these store rules.


This was seen on a Dairy Queen drive through.  I always keep my secret ice cream money in my underwear.


You should pay a…

An open letter to Emmanuel Macron, President of France

Dear Pres. Macron,

The President of the United States, Donald Trump, has been invited for the celebration of Bastille Day, a day for celebrating democracy and independence of the French people.

As a citizen of the United States, I encourage you to revoke the invitation. Donald Trump does not represent the vast majority of the American people. As you have stated publicly, if the United States is not going to support science, you have offered US scientists the option of emigrating to France for the continuation of their studies on climate change.

Additionally, Donald Trump has made his nationalist and blatantly racist feelings known on multiple occasions, again something I know that you personally find offensive.

The majority of Americans would support the decision for France to revoke his invitation. Citizens of the United States need to take responsibility for removing their country from a position of influence on the world stage. Our previous president, Barack Obama, strived to be a …

Safe Sex with Donald and Daisy

Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in a hotel room and Donald started to get romantic with Daisy.

The first thing Daisy asked was, "Do you have any protection?"

Donald frowned and said, "No."

Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get any protection, they could not get romantic.

"Maybe they sell some supplies at the front desk," she suggested.

So Donald went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had any supplies.

"Yes, we do," the clerk said and pulled a box out from under the counter and gave it to Donald.

The clerk asked, "Would you like me to put them on your bill?"

"HECK No!" Donald quacked, "I'll thuffocate!"