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Signs You May Have Overdone It on Thanksgiving


I overate on Thanksgiving, as usual.  If you're not sure, here are some of the signs...

  • You ate the turkey, the pop-up thermometer and the plastic net.
  • All your silverware is worn down to tiny stumps.
  • Scientists are reporting a slight but measurable shift in the earth's axis.
  • Paramedics brought in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of your chair.
  • Your "Gravy Boat" seats 12!
  • You ate enough potatoes to cause a shortage... in Idaho.
  • Your morning jog registered a 3.9 on the Richter Scale.
  • Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy.
  • The scale at the health food store registered "Error - 1 person only please" when you put in a quarter.  When you pressed continue, it charged you a buck and a half.
  • Nine guys tied ropes to you and tried to float you in the Macy's Parade.
  • Your relatives want to go home, but they're stuck in your gravitational field.
  • Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called... twice.


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