Skip to main content

Sunfyre's Homeschool Curriculum

My friend's daughter (a soon to be second-grader) informed her mom that she wants to be homeschooled. My friend, a little burnt out of spending her summer with a seven-year-old and a two-year-old, told her that second grade will be awesome. Although, she confessed to me that she's already looking forward to our annual "kids-are-back-in-school-Margarita-party".

Anyhow, if Sunfyre ran homeschooling, here's a sampling of the curriculum!


Titles of New Homeschooling Courses


Mathematics: Algebra and Other Math You'll Never Use

Guidance Counseling: Pulling up Your Pants And Other Dress for Success Techniques

Home Economics: Cooking Bacon

Computer Science: How to Clean Your Browsing History

Prelaw: Choosing the Right Bail Bondsman

Chemistry: Mentos and Coke and Other Homemade Bombs

Literature: Shakespeare and 400 Years of Knockoffs

American History: Absolute Truth According to Christian White Men

Geography: How to Use Google Maps

Drivers Education: Get a Job, Then We'll Talk

Do you have suggestions for future courses? Put them in the comments!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Friday Funnies: a couple LOLcats and one shameless plug

Is this the new flavor at Kungaloosh Gourmet Tea Company?

I'm Disabled and I Can Prove It

I'm disabled. 
I was born in 1970. About a year later I was diagnosed with spinal muscular atrophy. I never walked. I got my first wheelchair at kindergarten age, and my first power wheelchair in sixth grade.
Yet, around 4 to 6 times per year I have to, for one reason or another, prove that I'm disabled.
Granted, I'm 5 feet nothin', 112 pounds and sit in an electric wheelchair, but apparently that's just anecdotal evidence… We need science!
The Good Doctor
Every couple months I have to send my physician a form and ask him to fill it out. He has to state that I have spinal muscular atrophy, identify the diagnosis date, explained that my prognosis is something akin to "ain't getting better any time soon" and sign it.
With new Medicare regulations, the good doctor is not allowed to sign the said form without seeing me "face-to-face" to prevent fraud. Although I'm extraordinarily healthy, hospitalized last in 1996 for something unrelated to my dis…

Endangered Gorilla Killed after Child Falls into Habitat

One of this week’s trending topics on Facebook and twitter was a tragic story. A small boy fell into the gorilla habitat at the Cincinnati Zoo. Minutes later the western lowlands gorilla, a critically endangered species, was shot and killed by zoo personnel.
A tragic story has been made even more tragic through misinformation and misguided opinion on social media.
Here are six ways that Facebook and twitter users made the situation worse.
It’s the mother’s fault!
I’m a father of 14-year-old twins, a boy and a girl. I don’t know a single father or mother that has never in their lives lost sight of their three-year-old. I compare it to a trip to Walmart. You’ll see a toddler screaming and a mother completely exasperated, and usually another child being completely ignored. Those of you without children stand in judgment. I know I did. “If that were my child I would…” I’ll let you complete the sentence in condescending judgment. 
Parents, however, understand. We’ve all been there. Every …