|
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
Sun Jan 30, 2005...Calling all Funnies Next Friday I'll be publishing a special Super Bowl Edition of Friday Funnies. Send your football related jokes, cartoons, or funny photographs. I'll even have a contest... the winner, chosen by yours truly, will receive a genuine SunFyre Refrigerator Magnet.
Sat Jan 29, 2005... No Limit Texas Hold 'em Poker Tournament Last night I played my first No Limit Texas Hold 'em Poker Tournament. Like about 10 million other Americans I first learned about Texas Hold 'em poker while watching the World Series of Poker on ESPN about two years ago.
Then, one of SunFyre's readers who lives in my city, sent me an invitation to a Lions Club International fundraiser poker tournament. It had a $100 "donation" and the first prize was $3000. The top 10 players win money ranging from $100 to $3000, with a maximum of 200 players. Read all about my first No Limit Texas Hold 'em Poker Tournament Fri Jan 28, 2005... Friday Funnies #8 - Words of Wisdom Friday Funnies is going out on time this week! We sent the issue to 174 subscribers about 15 minutes ago. Read this week's issue titled Words of Wisdom. In other news, a reader sent this photo, reportedly of the Tsunami hitting Phuket, Thailand. Frankly, I'm not sure the photo is real. I suspect it isn't, but it's worth a look anyhow. Click on the photo for a larger view.
Johnny Carson, the "Tonight Show" TV host who served America a smooth nightcap of celebrity banter, droll comedy and heartland charm for 30 years, has died. Read the Johnny Carson Obituary and SunFyre's Two Cents. Sat Jan 22, 2005... I'm sitting at my desk Saturday morning watching the snow fall. They are calling for six to twelve inches today... welcome to Pennsylvania. Mandy, who's also from Pennsylvania, sent me the Dilbert comic strip. This issue is Ode to Snow... Dilbert - Snow Day at Work?
See more Snow and Blizzard Jokes Fri Jan 21, 2005... Funnies Postponed Friday Funnies is going to be a day late this week. Two things are happening, one blizzard and one birthday. The weather forecast is calling for up to a foot of snow tomorrow. We've actually had a mild winter. Our first snow was about two inches earlier this week, which is very late for Pennsylvania. Kristen's birthday is Sunday, so her parents and sister were coming for the weekend. They canceled because of the approaching snowstorm. So what does this have to do with Friday Funnies? Why am I shirking my God-given duties? Well, it's all about sex. Kristen and I had planned a date night. Dinner at Casa Grande, then shopping at the mall, while the kids stayed with her family. Our plans looked like they were toast, until I spoke with the kids former nanny, Lindsey. After hearing our plight, she invited them to spend the night at her house. I'm thinking, if the kids stay over, and Kristen and I have a romantic evening, and I shower her with gifts at the mall, then we come home in 12º weather, she'll certainly want to warm up naked under the covers. So... I gotta go get them kids outta here! Mañana... Thu Jan 20, 2005... Thunderbot Responds Michael, a.k.a. CEO Thunderbot, responds to his biography. Apparently he doesn't care at all about the content and quality of SunFyre Magazine, but wants his history accurately portrayed... here's the "truth" according to "The Bot". My Darling SunFyre Readers, As the new CEO of Sunfyre, I feel it is my duty to accurately update the bio written for me. As you may know, the author’s writing experience was gained during an intership at CBS. There he learned the journalistic skill of “fact or fiction, it’s all the same to us.” I will endeavor to correct the inaccuracies in red, to give you a better understanding of my colorful past. Shall we begin? Read his Original Biography Become CEO of the Day Wed Jan 19, 2005... Big Baby In the News... in Brazil, a woman gave birth to a 16.7 pound baby boy. He was delivered by C-section, and both mother and baby are doing fine. See Photos of the Huge Baby and read my two cents. Tue Jan 18, 2005... Introducing Our New CEO SunFyre Magazine has a new CEO, at least for a couple days. Michael, aka Thunderbot, didn't submit a bio, but I've gotten to know him a little. I'll tell you what little I know, I'll embellish a little, and I'll flat out lie for the rest. You get to figure out which is which. Read Thunderbot's Complete Biography You too could be CEO of the Day. Mon Jan 17, 2005... Super Bowl Predictions
I think the Pittsburgh Steelers will go on to win the AFC Championship Game, and, as we were hoping for several years ago, we will see an all-Pennsylvania Super Bowl. Going into Sunday, I was still predicting that the Indianapolis Colts could reverse their New England Patriots trend, and advance to the AFC Title Game. I think the only team that could beat Pittsburgh is Indianapolis. Unfortunately, Peyton Manning and his Colts won't get the opportunity. No long article today, just a quick poll. Vote this week to pick the Super Bowl winner. Subscribe to our SunFyre Surveys newsletter to receive an email when the poll closes, or come back here too check the results. Sun Jan 16, 2005... The Dreams Return I guess you'd call this next article a sequel. Back in August I wrote about experiencing sleep deprivation and vivid nightmares. If you haven't read the first article, I'd recommend it first. It helps set the stage. Then, check out the second article to see what scares a guy in a wheelchair. Sleep Deprivation and Vivid Dreams Sat Jan 15, 2005... 26 Excuses for Calling in Sick An article on www.careerbuilder.com caught my eye. Now that I'm working alone I no longer need to call in sick. I just do what needs to get done, both personally and professionally. I'm of the philosophy "Why waste a perfectly good Sick Day at home sick?" I'd much rather use sick days for mental health than physical health. I don't recommend you adopt my philosophy, frankly it hasn't served me well, and is one of the many reasons I'm currently self-employed. But, if you aren't self-employed, and you need a reason to call off from work, here's 20 of them actually used, according to the article. Read 26 Excuses for Calling in Sick. Fri Jan 14, 2005... Friday Funnies Friday Funnies is back after a week hiatus. Thanks go to Simon, Sarah, and Snapdragon for submitting jokes and cartoons. Read Friday Funnies #6 In the past two weeks, our weekly humor newsletter has grown to 137 subscribers, and our overall subscribers are at 152. I'm currently working on our first survey of 2005, it should be sent this coming week. And, as of today, we have 54 subscribers to SunFyre After Dark, the fiction edition of SunFyre Magazine. The first issue of After Dark will be sent as soon as we have 100 subscribers. Thu Jan 13, 2005... Jennifer Garner is Still Hot, We've Given up on You Just a quick update... apparently advertisers have given up on your New Year's Resolutions, probably before you have. Last week I reported that 15 companies were advertising products to help you lose weight while watching Alias. In last night's episode, only two companies that I noticed advertised anything related to weight loss. Bally's Total Fitness ran their typical ad, and our good friends at Yoplait are still at it. (And we know how I feel about yogurt ads.) Read SunFyre's Lose Weight in Two Simple Steps. Sat Jan 7, 2005 -- Are you a bigger nerd than SunFyre? I'm finally getting caught up with posts after the major update to SunFyre. I think I have most of the links working and content updated. As usual, the old pages won't be changed to the new design. Some of our long term SunFyre readers might enjoy reminiscing with the old styles. Ok, truth is, I don't want to spend hours upon hours changing pages that few people will ever see. Those readers who actually would reminisce about old html are probably to busy playing their Atari 2600 to notice my recent changes anyhow.
To those who missed yesterday's issue of Friday Funnies, that's probably because I didn't send it. With the new Magazine format, I was swamped. I decided to produce issue #6 next week. Keep sending those jokes. Fri Jan 6, 2005 -- Lose Weight for the New Year and Look like Jennifer Garner
You're wondering what this has to do with weight loss. Well, on January 1st, you and about half of America decided to make a resolution to lose some extra weight. On January 5th, advertisers decided you were too fat as well, especially those of you who watch Alias. Read about all 15 weight loss commercials in a single episode of Alias.
The new SunFyre Magazine is completed. Check out all the new links. Learn how you can get published on SunFyre, and how you can support SunFyre. Mon Jan 3, 2005 -- Sex, Dogs and Chickens -- Weird Headlines of 2004 Humming sex toy shuts Australian airport. Taiwanese man tries to
convert lions to Jesus, gets bitten. Talking toilet orders German men to sit
down. Chinese get busy signal on Beijing suicide line. Judging by the bizarre headlines that greeted readers around the
world, 2004 was a bumper year for the weird and wacky. Canadian guide dog barred for only answering its master's
commands in French. Japanese boy writes apology in blood for dozing in class.
The list is endless, living proof that truth is all too often stranger than fiction. Read more Weird World Headlines.
Read more about the Killer Whale born at SeaWorld in San Diego Sat Jan 1, 2005 ... The Year of Legacy Kristen and I want to build a house. We spent New Year's weekend driving around central Pennsylvania, looking at pieces of land. We saw a wide variety, from developments to farm land to building plots along rural routes. We found one situated directly beneath massive power lines, one next to a freeway overpass and one on a hill so steep all I could do was envision Homer Simpson bouncing down it yelling "doh, doh, DOH". Needless to say, it was a frustrating weekend. But, seven hours being a passenger gives you time to think, coincidentally one of my favorite things to do on January 1st. I had time to reflect, and time to focus on the important things in my life. Last year I made the resolution to make fewer resolutions and more results. This year I'm just making one: Read the full story about my New Year's Resolution. |
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
Copyright 2003-2005 Sunfyre.com and Jason Tweed except where otherwise noted -- for permissions, contact Sunfyre |
||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Wed
Jan 5, 2005 -- A Quick Note
Sun Jan 2, 2005 -- It's a 300 lb. Baby Boy (or Girl)
