Attack of the Camel Toads

This clip was submitted by Lisa, and made me laugh out loud. Thanks, Lisa.

Ten Things That Suck about the Flu

1) Mucus

Mucus, a.k.a. Snot, is one of the things, perhaps the #1 thing that sucks about getting the flu. This substance goes from clear, to white, to yellow, to green... then gradually back to clear. Each phase equally disgusting.

2) Fever

Simultaneously freezing and burning up... that's the fever that comes with flu. The worst is when you feel completely miserable. Weakly, you beg your spouse to fetch you a thermometer. He/she has listened to you whine for the past two hours about burning up, then the thermometer reveals that your temperature is 99.8, and he/she looks at you with those "you're such a wuss" eyes. You honestly think the thermometer is broken, but decide it isn't a good time to bring it up.

3) 48 hours, my A$$

Your watching the news during day six of your hiatus from life. The cheery blond co-anchor does a story about the "nasty 48 hour bug" going around, then she giggles. You're tempted to throw your chicken soup at the television.

4) Getting sick from taking care of your child

The crusty little urchin known as your offspring is a Petri dish of disease, and I don't just mean during flu season. You send them off to mingle with other Petri dishes at these laboratories called "kindergarten". All the kids trade germs faster than Yu-Gi-Oh cards. Then on Wednesday you have to take time off work to care for your precious little ball of Snot. By Friday, she's back in the laboratory, and you have a fever of 106, and your weekend is toast!

5) Giving it to your other children

Ok, it's Friday and your sick, but your youngest is back to kindergarten. You are taking the day just to relax and recover. Telephone rings. It's the elementary school, your middle child has a fever and needs picked up. While on the phone with the nurse, your cell rings. It's the Junior High nurse. "I called your house, but the line is busy..." is the sound of a really bad day coming. You spend the weekend caring for two, without time to recover yourself. By Monday, the kids are fine, and your in day three of the 48 hour bug.

6) Vitamin C, Sudafed, and Tylenol

Your arsenal of weapons against influenza. You start with vitamin C, trying to ward off the devil. Then you take Sudafed and can't understand why it's not working. Somewhere around 10:15 you discover your Sudafed expired in 2001, and the drugstore closed 15 minutes ago. You pop open the Tylenol with your shaking feverish hands, only to discover there is one tablet, and a bunch of Tylenol dust. You lick your finger and scoop as much dust as possible, then suck it off. You consider asking your spouse to hit Wal-Mart, then remember the "you're such a wuss" eyes.

7) Cheap tissues

Your wife likes Puffs with Aloe. Then you calmly explain that these are $2.89 per 50 count box. Then you show her the store brand "single-ply value tissues" which are only $1.19 per 100 count box. You explain how she is paying extra for advertising expenses and the "hype about Aloe". She smiles and lets you win this argument, surprisingly easily. That was four weeks ago. Now those value tissues feel like 80 grit sand paper. You've used three boxes, have graduated to cheap toilet paper, and are six hours away from using those industrial strength paper towels.

8) Unwanted advice

Every person you meet is instantly a world renowned physician. Your postal carrier stays healthy with Echinacea. The cable guy suggests anti-bacterial soap. Your mother-in-law describes how chicken soup is good for your soul, but only beef broth will conquer influenza. Ironically, most of the people you meet only offer advice on avoiding the flu. My personal favorite are the bastards who ask "You did get a flu shot, didn't you?" Then just sigh knowingly and roll their eyes when you say you didn't.

9) Giving it to your spouse

You and the kids are finally on your way to recovery. You begged your wife/husband to take vitamins, wash their hands, not share food, and try not to breathe at all. You explain how "you don't want this flu" repeatedly. You are thankful for little miracles. Two days later, your spouse runs a fever. You wonder how this is possible after all your preventive advice. He/she then informs you that when things were looking up they stopped with the vitamins and washing, and started breathing again. "I didn't think you were still contagious." Now they are staring at you. You fetch the thermometer and are excited to use your "you're such a wuss" eyes, but the thermometer reads 105. They give you the "what did you do to me" eyes!

10) Not updating your website for two weeks

So you just got back in the saddle with your weblog. Then the "48 hours my A$$" bug hits, and now your behind with work. You are spending every day catching up, and their isn't any time for writing. Now it's after midnight, and you realize the only thing you've done worth writing about recently was producing a complete continuum of mucus!

$100,000 Online Poker Tournament

I've been playing great poker, and decided this week to go for the big money.

I jumped on the World Series of Poker bandwagon last year, like millions of other people. I've played a little all my life, but never for money, unless you include the giant jar of pennies at Grandma's house.

Anyhow I've gotten much better, and played a few live No Limit Texas Hold 'em Poker Tournaments.

I began to play lots of free online poker, and learned a little, but quickly realized that playing free tables only teaches you to beat other play money players. It's pretty easy to build up quite a large stake on most free online poker sites, but you don't really improve your game. If you've never played at all, a few hundred hands can help you learn the game, but you won't become skilled.

I started playing real money games and instantly saw an improvement. First, the players who play for real money are generally better players. I'd always rather play with good players because they are more predictable.

Poker is all about predicting your opponents more than the cards. In the right situation, you can play the players and win money, regardless of your cards. In the wrong situation, you'll lose money regardless of the cards your dealt. The key is to learn which players you can beat, and which players you can't. Avoid the ones you can't, and empty the pockets of the rest!

Anyhow, yesterday I decided to take a bigger risk.

Normally I play fixed limit $2-$4. I play until I'm 20% ahead, then leave the table with my profits. If I get 20% down, I limp away. Lately, I've been playing really well. I'd sat down with $50 and left with between $60 and $70 at every table. Playing once or twice a day, I was up from my original $50 to $180.

That's when I started playing some low dollar tournaments. Tournament poker is different from table poker. I wanted to practice in a few large multi-table tournaments. I finished 10th out of 158, then 18th out of 370. My confidence was continuing to grow.

Every Sunday afternoon my favorite online real money poker site holds a $100,000 Guaranteed Online No Limit Texas Hold'em Tournament. This tournament costs $109 to play, and is open to 1500 people maximum. Most Sundays the field is between 750 and 800. The top 81 win cash, 81st prize is $250, and first prize is $25,000.

Kristen agreed to watch the kids. She also agreed to bring me food and beverage each hour during the five minute breaks. These tournaments typically last for six or seven hours.

I sat down at 2:00, and started playing really tight. I literally hadn't gotten into a hand for the first fifteen minutes.

The Big Blind came around to me, and I was dealt the 9-8 of diamonds. Only one player stayed in, raising only double the big blind, so I called.

The flop came 9-8-2, all hearts. He doubled the pot and pushed in 120. Normally, I'd be afraid of the flush, but with top two pair, I called.

The turn was an 8, I had the Full House. He was first to act, and pushed 300. Now I'm hoping he has the flush, preferably with an ace. I called. Now there was over 800 chips in the pot, and we only started with 1000 chips each.

The river was the seven of spades. This improved my hand even more. It gave a potential flush, a potential straight, but eliminated the straight flush and four-of-a-kind possibilities. Now, out of 169 possible starting hands, only one could beat me.

He pushed all-in. I called.

That's when he showed the nuts, 9-9. Literally, this was the only hand that could possibly beat me. He had the last two nines in the deck. The random chances of him having those cards was one in 2025.

I looked at the clock... it was 2:18. I finished 758th out of 762, and lost $109 in eighteen minutes!

Fertile women more attractive to men!

The attractiveness of a woman depends on her hormone levels, a new study has found.

According to researchers at the University of St Andrews, UK, women's facial attractiveness is directly related to their oestrogen levels.

Miriam Law Smith and her colleagues photographed 59 women, aged between 18 and 25, every week for six weeks. On each occasion, they provided a urine sample for hormone analysis and gave information on where they were in their menstrual cycle. None of the women wore make-up, nor were they taking the contraceptive pill.

The researchers then selected the photograph of each woman that had been taken at the time of her highest urine-oestrogen level, and this correlated to the point of ovulation in the women's menstrual cycles. These photographs were rated by 14 men and 15 women for attractiveness, health and femininity.

"There was a very strong and direct correlation between the level of each woman's oestrogen and how attractive, healthy and feminine they were found to be, showing that fertility is related to attractiveness. It is likely that those women with higher hormone levels also had increased levels of oestrogen during puberty - the time when the hormone has a crucial role in determining facial appearance," New Scientist quoted Law Smith as saying.

She said that the amount of oestrogen produced by a person's body during the average seven-year-long puberty is largely determined by heredity, and the hormone has lasting effects on bone growth and tissue formation as well as the skin's appearance.

Smith, however, cautions that teenage girls should not be given doses of oestrogen in the hope that they will grow into more beautiful women, because the hormone may have side effects.

Asian News International
London, November 2, 2005

Integrity Found, Honor Lost

What happens when Mr. Right goes to Iraq?

My Sister-in-Law, Lori, has always held out for Mr. Right. She thought she might have discovered him in a Pennsylvania State Police Officer named Danny. They dated a handful of times. Things were progressing slowly, but that seemed a perfectly comfortable pace for both of them.

He was one of those guys we wish we had more of on our police forces. His integrity and sense of duty attracted him to a law enforcement career, but the feeling of power some feel in uniform while carrying a sidearm hadn't corrupted those values. He was the "Marrying Kind" according to Lori.

Their relationship continued to grow slowly. It was long distance and he worked many weekends. When he wasn't working, he spent one weekend each month serving in the Pennsylvania Army National Guard. Lori and Danny talked on the phone and exchanged emails, but only saw each other every other month or so.

One day Danny called to let Lori know that his unit was being sent to Iraq for a tour of duty. She decided to share with him the feelings she had, and see if he had started thinking long term. He told her that, while she was the kind of woman he'd been searching for, he couldn't make commitments before leaving.

She talked to me, upset. "Why wouldn't he want to make commitments to her now? Wouldn't he feel better knowing he had a girl who cared deeply for him waiting at home?" Lori had a romantic idea of supporting her man while he was off to war.

I told her that my respect grew for him. The integrity that it takes to walk away, and hope she will still be around, is much higher than the guy who wants to elope the day before he ships out. He wanted what was best for Lori, not what was best for him. In Danny's normal way, he put others' needs ahead of his own.

I told her that, if it was destined, that he'd return and she would still be available. Furthermore, she'd respect and love him even more because of this sacrifice.

They started writing, real letters on real paper, a rarity today.

Several months passed. Lori was offered a blind date, which she accepted. Within a couple dates with Kevin, she had fallen in love. In August, Kevin proposed and she accepted.

She wrote to Danny almost immediately. She told him she had fallen in love, and of her happiness. She was nervous about his reaction.

A few weeks ago she received a letter. Danny was happy for her. She sensed he was genuinely happy, not putting on a face. She was relieved, and hoped that someday perhaps Kevin and Danny could meet.

Lori is getting married on Saturday, November 5th, 2005.

On October 27th, 2005, Staff Sergeant Daniel R. Lightner Jr. was killed when a home made bomb exploded along the roadside in Ramadi, Iraq. The explosion killed Danny, and injured two other soldiers from his unit.

Danny had distinct purpose in Lori's life. And hopefully, she had purpose in his. I'm further convinced by this story in a bigger plan that incorporates what may seem like senseless tragedy.

New Look and Feel

And New Features Too...

SunFyre has a new look. My web design skills are gradually improving, and it's been nearly a year since the last major change.

I moved in April, and haven't really touched SunFyre much since then. For that I apologize. But new house, new business, new support staff and a new life have kept me busy. Now things are settling down, and I'm getting the urge again.

Back Story...

I started SunFyre in August 2001, before the term 'blogging' had been coined. I actually bought the domain name for a friend, an artist and writer, who had the name based on a character in a fantasy fiction story she'd written. When the domain came up for renewal, I decided not to let it go even though she'd never done anything with it.

For the first 18 months or so, I messed around with it, but never knew exactly what to do. I started reading an online web journal from a guy in Toronto, Canada called Ajay. His website, www.ajayonline.com was an early blog, mostly about married life, the Toronto Raptors, web games, his fascination with Britney Spears, and occasionally some p0rn. (It eventually went totally p0rn, and today is a generic flash games website.)

Over four years later, my little blog has grown and grown. My brother-in-law, Vince, gave me the biggest complement. He said "Your website is, like, a real website." His way of saying it doesn't suck.

Let's look at what's new and, hopefully, improved.

The layout was designed in Photoshop. It's the first completely Photoshop layout I've used on SunFyre. I'm far from an expert, but I like the simple look and feel.

You'll see more advertising in the new website. I need to earn a little. I estimate that, when going strong, I spend 15 hours a week, and $500 a year on SunFyre. The Google advertising and web searches have earned me about $50 a month, so it's about break even on my expenses. I like to get a little for my time this year. As always, I'm very picky about my advertisers. I only publish ads from website that sell real products that I will stand behind.

I'm planning on updating the T-Shirt Shop more frequently. About once a month I'll add a new shirt or something fun and original.

I'll be publishing more original content, much more. My goal is to produce one article each week, sandwiched between short, but insightful, journal entries. I'll borrow and steal content occasionally, but only within the context of another original article. Content is King when developing a quality, and profitable, website.

Photography has always been one of my unfulfilled passions. In college I played around, but couldn't use the dark rooms, and big clunky cameras were all we had. With tiny digital cameras (that actually take decent pictures) and Photoshop, I'm starting to get back into it. SunFyre will have more original photography than ever.

Finally, I'm going to swing the doors open, and let the writers come forward. Last January I got the idea that I'd publish articles and stories by other writers. Unfortunately, no one offered much. One woman submitted several very bad stories about being disabled. They were so full of cliche, I questioned whether she was actually disabled.

This year I'm going to spend some time actually recruiting. If you'd like to write for SunFyre, fiction or non, get in touch. Meanwhile, I'll be scouring the net for talent and inviting new writers to submit. I've even created a revenue sharing system so good articles can earn a little cash.

Reader feedback has always been important to me. I read every email, and respond to most. (To the guy who keeps offering me replica rolex watches, I prefer TAG Heuer, and to the woman who is clearly concerned about the size of my manhood, I honestly don't need your pills.) I keep publishing my email, and keep getting more spam, but one or two each day are from readers. Keep them coming.

For those of you who want instant gratification and public acknowledgment, I'm adding a comments link to every new post.

Finally, sharing SunFyre will be easier than ever. I'm adding a feature to "forward this article to a friend" and creating "printer friendly" pages that can be printed or downloaded and emailed.

Thanks for hanging in there during my hiatus. Hopefully by January 1st, this site will be completely updated and on a roll with new writers and content.

Check back frequently, and don't forget to bookmark us.